Creating Community

“Sometimes one person can change your perception of a community. For me, that person was Deantini and the community was Columbia. Jim’s story, his warm welcome to all former students, aka ‘100 percent alumni engagement,’ and his encouragement to view the world with Beginner’s Mind open to all possibilities, were inspiring. Yet, actions speak even louder than words, and kindness speaks volumes.

“The year was 2012, and my classmate Kyra Tirana Barry ’87 was president of the Columbia College Alumni Association. After our 25th reunion, Kyra unexpectedly requested my help with Columbia College Women’s mentoring program. As part of the role, I was invited to join the CCAA Board of Directors.

“I was very hesitant about volunteering. For numerous reasons, I didn’t feel that I ‘fit’ as an alum. After graduation, I had minimal involvement with Columbia, attending some reunions, and giving nominally only because I liked to see my name together with my classmates. My husband and I had a mountain of debt after medical school, and we were finally seeing the light.

“Before one of my first board meetings, where I knew almost no one, I felt the nervous excitement of a freshman walking into John Jay Dining Hall. I picked up my kids after school then rushed to campus from New Jersey, only to find the ‘temporarily full’ sign at the parking garage. I frantically circled the block and spied a tight parking space on West 114th Street. Parallel parking is not a necessary suburban skill, and I was out of practice. Throngs of students traipsed in front of and behind my car as I failed miserably. It felt like a sign — the world was telling me that I don’t belong at Columbia. I was going to be late. I should just go home.

“Then I saw Deantini walking down the John Jay steps. He was scheduled to give an update at the board meeting. I’d only met Deantini a few times and I prayed that he wouldn't recognize me. I cringed with embarrassment as I saw him turn in my direction. But then Deantini looked at me, looked at my car, looked at the space and with a thoughtful expression, walked over and calmly asked if he could help. We were going to the same meeting and Deantini is a car guy. He offered to park my car for me, and then expertly parallel parked it — in seconds. He then tried to spare my feelings by saying that it was a challenging parking space.

“Jim Valentini is a kind person, caring and well-intentioned. Small acts of kindness create community. It’s not surprising that he’s beloved, or that the College has thrived under his thoughtful tenure, strong leadership and his continued attention to the needs of students, faculty and the greater Columbia community.

“Maya Angelou said, ‘I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.’ I don’t remember that board meeting, but I do remember feeling that if the dean of Columbia College makes time to help me because perhaps he thinks that I have something to offer as a volunteer, then maybe I do.

“Trust in one’s leaders is paramount. I was inspired to volunteer because I was convinced that Deantini’s sincere and thoughtful guidance made a positive difference at Columbia. His numerous initiatives to support students’ academic and emotional well-being have made the College a better place. My entire family is grateful for Deantini’s decade of leadership, and we wish him the very best always.”